It has been a good long while since I last wrote anything here. I’ve been avoiding sitting down to write due to anxiety over what I could say and how I should say it. I’ve opened this page so many times but nothing would come out. It’s time to make a commitment to myself to write more often.
- My depression and anxiety are pretty bad this weather. I started paid employment recently, which has been exacerbating matters. I’m doing the best I can to manage things, but that in itself is a full-time job. For the most part, I still have to be my own therapist. I did ask for a referral to a psychologist on the NHS but I was referred to occupational health instead, which isn’t doing much good.
- My fibromyalgia still dominates my days. I did ask for a referral to the pain clinic on the NHS but I had to self-refer to a pain management session instead. The session was pretty amazing, and has helped me learn to take control over things, well as much as I can. I’ve been taking pregabalin for about 5 months now and have seen some improvements.
- I have gotten out of the habit of going to the gym, and I have quit my Krav Maga training. Again, I have allowed anxiety to defeat me.
- I visited a shamanic practitioner last week, and had an amazing healing experience. Honestly, I feel like I made more progress in our two hour session than in the months of occupational therapy I’ve had.
- And that has been a reminder that my passion is shamanic practice, something I have been neglecting for some years now. I am now taking steps to resolve that!
I need to start taking more responsibility for things in my life.
Thanks for listening.